Everyone’s been there.
Those times where it seems like one thing after another is falling apart around you.
When it seems like no matter how hard and fast you build, you can’t compete with how quickly things continue to crumble.
It can feel like you’ll never make it out on the other side (even though you somehow manage to find your way, eventually), and it’s hard to even see the other side at all.
Layer on top of that the fact that you are a Mother, a role model, and a leader in your family, and it can be beyond overwhelming.
I’ve been through these challenges on more than one occasion. Even though it’s been awhile, I was chatting with a reader about the trials she is going through right now in her own life, and those feelings of stress, helplessness, and overwhelm came flooding right back to me. That’s how real this can get.
It’s not a good feeling.
So how do you overcome and lead your family through the darkness?
I’ve learned a few strategies over the years that never fail to start turning things around, and lift the veil of stress so I can start finding my way through, and lead my family to the “other side”.
How To Stay Strong Through The Tough Times
Keep A Gratitude Journal
It’s no secret that I adore my gratitude journal, but it has very much earned that special time in my day! Writing in a gratitude journal is all about positivity, and finding those things that are going right. The things that make you happy and fulfilled. As difficult as life can get sometimes, there will always, always, be something you can write in there that will remind you it’s not all bad!
Anyone who knows me well, knows I am not a religious person. But faith doesn’t have to be about religion. It’s just about knowing you’re not alone. Whether it’s a belief in God watching over you, Buddhist ideals and principles, belief in the strength of humanity, or any other number of things, faith can give you the strength to keep going when you don’t think you can do it on your own and need that feeling of support.
As Moms, we tend to think we are the “be all, end all” of the family. And while that can be true to an extent, we need our own support as well! Anything you are going through, someone has had to endure before. Don’t be afraid to ask for help, or an ear to listen to you. You might be surprised and find that someone you turn to has been through the same thing, and can support you in ways you could not have done alone!
Be The Strength
As the leader in your family, it is important that you stay strong, even when you can’t see the end of the tunnel just yet (that’s where the Faith comes in again!). Moms tend to decide the weather in their home, which is where sayings like “Happy wife, happy life” and “If Mama aint happy, aint nobody happy” ring true! Be the rock, be positive, and show your family that Mom sees the other side, it’s coming, and you’re all going to make it through together!
The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands in times of challenge and controversy. ~ Martin Luther King Jr.
It can seem almost selfish to think of doing something for yourself when it feels like the world is falling apart around you, but trust me when I say this is important. You need your body to be healthy, and your mind to be balanced, to be able to tackle the tough times with confidence. Take time for yourself away from the struggles you are facing. Go for a walk, watch a movie, read a book, cozy up with a cup of tea, anything you enjoy that can free your mind for a few minutes so you can think clearly about what is going on, and how to move forward.
Be Kind To Yourself
Every situation is different, and while some can just be random events, others will be straight up your fault. Sorry, but it’s true. That doesn’t mean that you back down and cower in the corner feeling sorry for what has happened. You need to be able to forgive yourself for anything you have caused, so you can move forward, and focus on making it right. When your family is facing difficult challenges, it’s not the time to feel bad for you. You need to take responsibility for what you may have done to cause it, and fix it, end of story.
Get Creative and Be Open to New Ideas
Sometimes we get so stuck inside our own heads that we can’t see an answer that is right in front of us. Not to get in your face here, but if you’re stuck in a bad place right now, chances are what you were doing wasn’t working. It’s important to be able to acknowledge that fact, take a step back, and be open to trying something new if you want to get different results.
Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, expecting different results. ~ Albert Einstein
Control the Controllables
Know what you can affect, and work with that. Don’t dwell on the way others are acting, things they are doing, or events caused by nature itself…control the controllable. What can you do to make things better? What can you contribute that will help move things forward? How can you show others the way to persevere?
Find Your “Happy Place”…and Visit Often!
Everyone needs a retreat sometimes, where you can get away and clear your head. While a vacation isn’t always in the cards, visiting your own “happy place” can certainly give you the same results! Whether it’s a physical place, activity, or just a memory you enjoy reliving when you close your eyes from time to time…get there!
Become a Master of Finding The Light
You’ve heard the saying “every cloud has a silver lining”, and it’s true…if you believe it to be true! If you want to find the “silver lining”, you can. It’s just a matter of you taking the time to really try and see the good in a bad situation. But if you look hard enough, there’s always something.
I know sometimes it can just feel like too much, and you read this thinking “that’s not going to be enough, it wont work for me”, but it will…if you want it to.
You can do this!
I can’t guarantee that it will make everything better, that would be silly. I can’t fix your finances, heal your family members, or strengthen your marriage.
I am a very firm believer that life’s challenges are given to those who can handle them, they just may not know it yet.
Find that “inner hero”, raise your head high, and lead your family to a place of calm, comfort, and contentment.
Looking back on the “tough times” in your life, what helped you make it through and support your family? Comment below!
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